We hear this all the time from our moms and other who have gone before into the glorious battle that is matrimony. But it’s not until we bump our heads against real life do we discover the truth: marriage is not always easy.
In the beginning, you are so happy that it’s hard to focus on anything else. It’s all about the little things at first: missing keys, a rushed breakfast, conflicting schedules. These are the “big issues” of your day to day life. Then as time goes on, the two of you start to face reality: someone loses a job, a car breaks down, a move pops up or a loved one passes away. Pretty soon, keys and calendars don’t seem all that important anymore.
This week was a challenge for me to remember that tired phrase: “Don’t sweat the small stuff”. It seemed it was always something; I was late to work, I got lost, the bank account got low, it snowed. And somewhere in there I set aside my husband and decided I was more important. Poor Brian is so good at putting me first (Yes, I married Jim Halpert) that it makes the task of working my way back to my vows tough sometimes, but guess what? That’s the point.
Marriage is supposed to be hard. It’s supposed to push and stretch you to be a better person than you were yesterday. You’re going to cry and you’re going to wonder when something so promising became so broken. Then you’ll wake up one day and surprise yourself. The person in the mirror is kinder, more patient, happier. You’ve changed.